Why do we even exist? Every day I wake up, tired, not really interested in living. The purpose of man/womyn’s journey has been lost. It has been perverted into an ever evolving dream of wealth, power, sex, and consumption.
Today was particularly difficult. I sat alone on my couch, pondering what it was life is meant to be. And I could no longer make sense. My mind is clouded with distractions, technological interruptions, car exhaust being spewed into my face as I walk along the concrete sidewalk that I really wish was grass. My head hurts from God only knows what. My eyes are always itchy from stupid allergies that should have never existed in the first place. And I say all this because, as good as life can be, it really always sucks.
Man/Womynkind was never intended to live this way. What is the purpose of a city? What is the purpose of a car? What is the purpose of a motherfucking sidewalk! Why can’t it just…not be there.
I live in this city, and nearly every day I regret being alive because of what we as city dwellers, and even non-city dwellers have done to our earth. The Creator designed, through evolution, or not (whatever you choose to believe [ IT REALLY DOES NOT MATTER] ), for us to live in a wild, green, free, world full of creatures, plants, and a healthy atmosphere. What did we do? We decided we knew better than Al-Awwal, and threw our hands into the earth, full of hatred, rage, and pride.
Our desires are no longer that of Al-Malik, but that of our sin; it is inherent now in our wretched, civilized, lifestyles. Yahweh desired for our love to be for him and his/her creation. Our Mother, our Father, our lover has looked upon us for generations, and decidedly loved us, despite the hatred we spew upon his/her earth. Our love for Kitchi Manitou existed for such a short time in the span of human history that one might say it never existed at all. Yet the Great One has loved us, unconditionally, and immutably since the moment he/she laid eyes on his/her creation.
Our love for ourselves, and our hatred of creation is our destruction. Many say that The Most High will destroy the earth in the end to rebuild a kingdom. I do not believe that. I believe that the destruction of the world will come at our hands, and Jehovah Rapha will resurrect the earth in a new kingdom of wildness where those who chose to follow Jesus message of love, forgiveness, and peace, will live forever; live wild and free with the Creator. Walk hand in hand with the Holy One. Our true Love will be our companion, not our “King.”
My depression is righteous I believe. I am sad at the disregard for Yah. He/She is our holy lover. Our peace. Our light, our guidance, and as man/womyn kind we should be more than capable of caring for that which El Elyon has given us, but we refuse.
Our pride is our destruction as the old adage says (I of course paraphrase). Let us not do nothing. Let us feel the pain that Nzambi feels every day we further destroy his/her creation.
Please, let us not do nothing.
Peace, and Resist